my goose, you've cooked it all right.

I couldn't wait another second to tell you what went on in the world today.
The Onion Cutter has us all at our last wits. He continues to ask for his job back. The problem is he still has a job but he still can't come to grasps with the idea that his job description has changed. He's not allowed to work with sharp objects. Technically, he is no longer the onion cutter. It's like he's still got a bit of trauma. For weeks he's been walking around telling us that he fired people (all of the people who enforce the rules he doesn't like) and yesterday he tried to convince me that he fired my boss and that he was my new boss. "I kick him out." I asked him if he had picked my Boss up by the shirt collar and kicked him out (I pantomimed as well) but he said no. This does not work for me as I only bow to violent coups.
The worst part is, someone let him stay up watching the food network last night.
He's been walking around all day today telling us all "you're my people" and calling us FL but he won't tell us what that means. He started hanging up paper towel signs all over the kitchen with little notes about his FL restaurant. I don't know, you tell me. Florida? Food Lover? Fat Larry's?
I should be appeased and not so perturbed because he told me I am his favorite chef. But all of these lay-offs the Onion Cutter keeps proclaiming can get worrisome.