why i am going to turn on some carole king while i think about eating dinner tonight

I just finished reading The History of Love. It's a legitimate book, I'm not being cutesy. In fact, it's so legitimate, maybe you've heard of it.

Somewhere in its pages it talks about love (imagine that). The love where you love someone but then they are gone and there's a hole...or maybe it's that your love grows around them and you're a tree and then they're gone. You love them, they become part of you, you grow and then they're gone; and like a tree that makes space inside itself for something that is near it or rests on its bark you now have a space inside yourself for something new. 

Because the truth is, you never had the right to keep that something forever, to yourself, inside your bark. So now there is a hole and it needs to be filled by something else. That's why we fall into this pattern of behavior that people call "the rebound." But the rebound seeks for an immediate fill for empty spaces. I don't think this suffices. For each void we need to try at least ten new things and in the process of trying we're bound to make new holes.

We love and then things change, it doesn't mean there isn't love that lasts or that love that doesn't last is bad, it just means that we keep accumulating holes and we keep filling them with different things. This is how we embrace the world around us. It begins at birth when we must all the time be held and be loved and then we learn we are separate from everyone who has been holding and loving us. Our first hole. So we try something new. And so it continues.

To make the holes go away would be deforestation.