is there a sign on my head?

My life is turning into a continuous train of jokes.

One morning I had finished the usual batch of soup and the phone rang.
Hello, -- Grill. This is Marge, how can I help you?
Football player, I call him Paisley, always orders the same thing. After he tells me his order I habitually say, This is Paisley, isn't it, and write his name down on the ticket. Not that day. That day he says:
"You know who this is. I know you know who this is. I know you know."
Yes. Paisley knows that I know that he doesn't want gravy on his mashed potatoes. Last night he says to me, "I haven't seen you in a while, I thought you might've quite. I'd be so distraught!" Ha, ha, Paisley. Ha.

The other week on campus this kid who wears a cape and often sings to himself told me I was weird.

I went to a concert with a boy last month and he said,
"I'm not trying to make a move on you but this is the only way I can stretch out my arm."
So Shorty Petite puts his arm around my waist but not touching my waist. I can't help but think that wasn't comfortable for him. Who stretches like that?

And today....my crowning moment.
I kind of got stood up. I'm actually still a little confused.
This kid from my church, who I've never noticed before, called me Monday night and asked what my schedule was for Thursday and Friday. That was it. No other introduction. Well that's a 48 hour period. What do I say to that? So I said, I don't know. This all ended in this plan that today he would make us peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and we'd go feed ducks.
Yes it's been kind of rainy today. But I don't remember any clause in our conversation that said weather permitting.
It had been 20 minutes from when we were supposed to meet and I hadn't heard anything. So I called him. Again, what do I say in this situation?
"Umm...did you decide we shouldn't feed ducks in the rain?"
"Yeah, I figured it wouldn't be a good idea."

Sometimes these people leave me speechless.
I'm not even that weird. I'm laughing. But I'm not that weird.