my favorite tv show of old

I was always happy to be "sick" on Wednesday mornings when I was in elementary school so I could stay home and watch this:

saguaro

The world has gotten taller in the last year. At least, I'm fairly certain it would be abnormal and not a real thing for me to have shrunk five inches. Everyone I live with and talk to seem to be taller than me. And every pair of pants I wear or try on need to be rolled up at least four inches. I feel like a child again. In two days I turn twenty three--a thing which I can't think too deeply about because my brain might explode--and I feel like child.

Sometimes childness might not be such a bad thing. The other morning I saw a children's book about cacti on the sofa. Of course I read it. I felt particularly smart for all the information I was able to glean in those twenty pages. Then I realized why I feel like I was smarter as a child. They have cool books like that for children. Why I can't seem to find something that fun for older kinds of people? My new favorite hangout: the children's library.

In light of embracing this young readers' sampler style of information, I continue.



This ^ is an amazing idea. Read more about it here.


That first year, I sometimes would hum a little to myself, "Obama makes me feel young and twenty one again." He's charming (a new thing I'm trying to embrace), he utilizes technology (I love technology and the media), and he promises transparent politics (wow). The White House Accountability website makes me swoon. I hesitated bringing this up because people seem to fixate on my crush on the Obamas therefore naturally adding drama to any of my thoughts on politics. But I'm going to say it. Why did this happen? I know I can't expect Dave (1993).


I found a new olive oil cake. J. Bottoms and I are bicycling to a little fancy market to buy spelt flour and such suches and to make it. For my birthday. Ooooooooeeeeee.


End of sampler.

image from: craftzine.com blog.

the powerful princess

The other day at the bakery Cindy Lauper's Time After Time played on the radio. It took me back to being nine years old, laying in bed late-night-wakefulness. My little white digital alarm clock/radio would play always. All night radio listenings, book readings. So much craddling in music from decades past. White ceiling with shadows that fade away as eyes become used to the dark, bare window full of night sky.

Today at the bakery I had one of those times when my paranoia over junk food turned to physiological feelings of I'm-going-to-throw-up. We all know I've made a great deal of progress in my life but sometimes I haven't gotten there. 
I ate a red pear I had brought from home and felt better.
It seems obvious but sometimes the quiet wisdom of intellect is squashed in squalling weather of weakness. In other words, maybe I should have known this already, but eating lovely healthy food quiets the storms.

Then I started contemplating feminism and the middle ages. That was another thing completely.

because of the lighter that stuck to my purse

I wish we had piazzas instead of facebook.

Add them to the list of things which have held me in magical fascination since childhood.

List of childhood fascinations:
redwoods
dinosaurs
Fantasia
books
magnets
digging around in the dirt
fresh homemade bread
pesto
worms
Smith Family Robinson
Cinderella
drums
face painting
Aunts Ione and Milly
being oustide
geodes
barometers
dress-ups
piazzas

we never should have the first time around*

I'm back.

And as I've gotten older I've piece by piece, processly decided there's no time for feeling sorry for myself or complaining so I'm not going to say a word about that.

Instead focus all our faces on: [dadadaddadadadadada!!!!]
Just the pretty news that I am 10 footsteps away from being a real free-lance filmmaker.

"Is this really how I will be making my living?" I just asked myself.
Myself replied, "How exciting!"

And I'm thinking about quilting bookmarks to sell. I've got bajillions of fabrics of yards. And I think bookmarks meet my talent level. I think there's some bazaar I could enterrrrrrrrrr...herm.

Went to lots of grocery stores (my favorite indoor activity) in California and stared at their olive bars. Never bought a single olive, just stared and thought. About quinoa salads. [sigh]

I've been thinking about my bits (or entire sections i.e.: arms, legs, souls, soles, fish, filet) of personality that need mending. Sometimes my independence isn't a silly loner streak kind of thing, sometimes it's nonchalance bordering (oh, I'm babying myself with that one) on hard heartedness. I could use ten (bajillion yards?) more compassion. But you're the greatest world and God out there, n'est-ce pas ? So you will be patient with how prickly I frequently end up being. I tell myself that. Mainly to remind myself that I am no two inch succulent split-rock plant, I've got infinity inches to grow and so I can have patience and not well...[deep breaths] not not have patience.

Last night I drank a mt. dew to stave off a migraine and I was a five year old for quite sometime and taunted Yanka with the return of nineties fashion*. She blamed it on forever21. I pointed out the Willow (from Buffy) inspired floral print denim overalls at H&M. I'm still delighted by it all.

Hey, parents, sister, do you remember that childhood book with the soldier in the red coat who found that trunk of treasure and there was that weird dog creature?

I got complimented on my vowel pronunciation tonight at a hot chocolate club meeting.

bark and barometrics

Drove across the Golden Gate Bridge.
And realized a childhood dream.
I went to a forest with really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really tall trees.

Redwoods.
Palo Colorado.

THE FUTURE WILL BRING
SOME OF LES PHOTOS.
probably.

They were like the trees in my dinosaur book. But I could not find any triceratops. I pretended to be a brontosaurus, Yanka was a giraffe.
They were like the trees I read about in elementary school science books, the books that spurred excitement and wonder. It was in third grade science that I set my sights on a trip to the redwoods.

Science
is
amazing.

When I was nine my mom and I found instructions on how to make a barometer. With just the simple bits we had around the house we put together a homemade atmospheric pressure telling gadget. That was the coolest thing ever.



Drove back over the Golden Gate Bridge.