Some days you wake up and even though you do yoga and eat a small dish of homemade pumpkin custard for breakfast with a best friend and a favorite documentary professor finds you in a group of people to take you aside and say, "I think you should look into this doc opportunity because I think it's right up your alley," and from that you can gather that you have manifested to those who are more experienced that you have some kind of potential you still end the day thinking, "I'm short and I can't relax and I go to school with models."
On those days you probably should have dug your hot pants (à la James Brown and James Dean) out of the dirty clothes and scrubbed the homemade pudding splashes out of them (the pudding that you whipped up when you and K realized that the clove measurement written in the recipe was wrong and something needed to be added to neutralize it) and you probably shouldn't have worn your sweater dress for a top because even though it makes your head and shoulders look so classy (especially with your newly re-bobbed hair) it makes your legs look so short and your legs are your favorite part of your body. You learned long ago that if you can start out the day with a comfortable outfit (among other things) everything else falls into place.
But then, we all know these days happen. There will always be days when you think--well, when you doubt all of your lumpish fibers and merits. Why you still have these days...I have no explanation. But I think it was a good idea that you changed out of the unflattering sweater and dug out the hot pants and are planning on going out. Out to parties, out to life. You don't find any answers or comfort in not living.
So I'll see you at that party tonight, OK?